Thursday, April 16, 2009

Peanuts and "witnessing"

(The following really happened.)

Years ago, I used to be a Christian and was rather involved in a little Baptist church in the Seattle area. One of the activities church members participated in was door to door canvassing--er, that is, witnessing.

My two friends Mark the older and Mark the younger were out one Saturday morning knocking on doors, asking people's permission to tell them about Jesus. One of the houses they went to belonged to an older lady, who invited them in and asked them to sit down in her living room. Mark the older proceeded to engage in conversation with the lady, while Mark the younger sat at the end of the couch, mostly remaining quiet and (theoretically at least) praying.

While he was praying, Mark the younger noticed a bowl of peanuts sitting on the end table, and thought to himself that it wouldn't hurt to eat one. So he did. Time passed, as Mark the older continued to converse with the lady to whom they were witnessing. As the time passed, somehow, Mark the younger found himself eating peanut after peanut from the bowl on the end table.

In fact, he ate so many of them that when the time came to leave, he somewhat embarrassedly realized he'd eaten the entire bowl. So, being the honest and gracious Christian that he was, he decided to apologize to the lady of the house for eating all of her peanuts.

"Ma'am, I'm really sorry, but as it happens, I skipped breakfast, and I was a little hungry, and it seems I've eaten your entire bowl of peanuts." he said.

"Oh--no problem at all!", she replied. "I can't eat them, you see, as my teeth are too bad. So I just suck off the candy coating, and then stick them in that bowl."


Mike Edwards said...

I have heard this told as a joke hundreds of times in my old baptist circles--only this would be going back a TON of years, as I've not ran in that circle for over 6 years now.

Megs said...

Wow! mark and mark's story must have spread wings! the title 'peanuts and witnessing' reminds me of dear Elmer, from Paraguay, who stood before an international audience giving a passionate, heartfelt description of he and Benjamin's team's work planting peanuts at the peanut farm in rural, war-torn Liberia. He mentioned the word 'peanut' often, and, sadly, given his enthusiasm, we the English-speaking elements of the audience were in absolute hysterics laughing, as he pronounced 'peanut' 'penis'!

Joe said...